Bea propped both elbows on the turquoise countertop at Tylo\u2019s Corner Tea Shop. \u201cOne strawberry bubble tea, please,\u201d she said to Tylo, whose dreadlocks were caught up in a red hairnet that matched his cherry red shirt.<\/p>\n
\n\t\u201cSame thing for me,\u201d said Nola. \u201cBut peach.\u201d<\/p>\n
\n\t\u201cLadies…\u201d said Tyrone as he set his blenders to whirring, capped off their cups with a precise flourish, then presented their drinks with a subtle bow.<\/p>\n
\n\tBoring memorization was always more tolerable if you started with a bubble tea. Nola could drill Bea on bones in the leg, for example, and if Bea came up with tibia, fibula, and femur she\u2019d reward herself by sucking up a globby ball through the fat straw. She had at just that moment granted herself a gummy bubble for identifying the humerus, radius, and ulna when they exited the tea shop right into the path of Gordy and Kitty.<\/p>\n
\n\t\u201cBubble tea!\u201d cried Kitty. \u201cI love bubble tea! The balls require such a precise boiling limit, so they don\u2019t get mushy…but Tyrone\u2019s are perfect.\u201d<\/p>\n
\nShe stopped so she could give fleeting thought to getting one herself, but reconsidered and pulled a green-wrapped koo-bar out of her black rubber bag. \u201cLook!\u201d she said. \u201cI\u2019m a Bean-Tek kid! Now I get\u2019em for free!\u201d<\/p>\n
\n\t\u201cWe both get\u2019em for free,\u201d said Gordy, taking a bite out of his own koo-bar. \u201cWatch your claws Kitty,\u201d he added, ducking to avoid Kitty\u2019s fingernails which were now unsheathed at eye-level. \u201cThey\u2019ve gotta be two inches long!\u201d<\/p>\n
\n\t\u201cNot quite,\u201d said Kitty, admiring her nails, which were shiny with black polish. \u201cBut they\u2019re longer than ever. And so is my hair. I had to do my roots three weeks earlier than usual this time.\u201d<\/p>\n
\n\t\u201cWhatever you\u2019re using,\u201d said Nola fingering her wispy brown curls, \u201cI need some.\u201d<\/p>\n
\n\t\u201cYour hair\u2019s good,\u201d said Bea. As they walked toward home, she patted Nola on the head and sucked up a bubble tea blob. \u201cI bet Kitty and Gordy\u2019s hair would be perfectly acceptable too…even if they didn\u2019t dye it.\u201d<\/p>\n
\n\tGordy grimaced in disgust. \u201cI don\u2019t dye my hair,\u201d he said.<\/p>\n
\n\t\u201cReally?\u201d asked Bea skeptically. \u201cI\u2019m pretty sure your hair was black last week. How\u2019d it get to be red?\u201d<\/p>\n
\n\t\u201cWhat?\u201d demanded Gordy. \u201cMy hair isn\u2019t red!\u201d<\/p>\n
\n\t\u201cDon\u2019t you ever<\/em> look in the mirror Gordy?\u201d asked Kitty. She gave Gordy\u2019s head a friendly rumple.<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cIt is looking kind of carroty lately,\u201d agreed Nola.<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cNo one<\/em> in my family has red hair,\u201d insisted Gordy. \u201cThey all have black hair! Do you know how statistically improbable it would be for me to have red hair?\u201d<\/p>\n \n\tA bright blue Jiffy-Ship delivery truck, slowing to a stop in front of 107 Crotchett Street, distracted everyone from Gordy\u2019s hair. The truck tooted its horn twice, and a driver hopped out.<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cDelivery for Hortensia Flannery!\u201d called the driver. \u201cSignature required!\u201d<\/p>\n \n\tHe approached the marble stairs and stopped in front of Bea.<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cWould you sign this Miss?\u201d he asked.<\/p>\n \n\tBea scrawled as legibly as she could manage on the electronic screen the Jiffy-Ship man was holding in front of her. Then she accepted a large blue envelope as he handed it over.<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cI guess I\u2019d better run this over to Hort,\u201d Bea said to Nola. \u201cShe\u2019s popular today. Keep those bones handy.\u201d She skipped into the street, pausing to pat Bob the fruit-cart pony who was stationed at the curb behind the Jiffy-Ship truck. Bill the fruit-cart man was tearing the wrapper off a Koo-bar and Bob nickered in appreciative anticipation.<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cBob sure loves these Koo-thingies,\u201d said Bill. He fed the bar to Bob who gobbled it up with obvious delight.<\/p>\n \n\tBea nodded and stroked Bob\u2019s withers until her hand encountered two bony bumps near his shoulders that didn\u2019t correspond to a scapula or a humerus or any other bone she\u2019d learned about. \u201cIs Bob okay?\u201d she asked. \u201cHe\u2019s got bumps.\u201d<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cWell, I\u2019m not sure,\u201d said Bill, as he counted out change for Tyrone who had popped out of his shop to replenish his supply of oranges. \u201cBut I sure hope so. I\u2019m getting those looked at when the vet comes to check the ponies next week. It\u2019s almost like he\u2019s trying to grow handles, isn\u2019t it?\u201d<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cHandles?\u201d Bea repeated with a chuckle that trailed off as uncomfortable thoughts crept back into her head. Plants show different gifts in different climates,<\/em> Mola Peggi\u2019s words replayed. Make no hasty assumptions about its nature.<\/em><\/p>\n \n\tRidiculous,<\/em> Bea insisted to herself with a shake of her head. Eating Koohoo couldn\u2019t change someone\u2019s hair. Or bones. Completely ridiculous.<\/em><\/p>\n —–<\/p>\n \tBea sprinted, two steps at a time, to the third floor of the Mervin Frostly Science building. She stepped out of the stairwell and into the hallway just as the elevator dinged.<\/p>\n \n\tA man in a blue business suit and a large fedora hat with a green feather tucked jauntily in the hatband stepped through the elevator doors as they opened in front of Bea. There was something just a little too bushy about his moustache, and something just a little too stick-outish about his hair. His nose was pointy, and so was his chin. He swung a large black case in front of him and strode a little too cheerfully toward Hortensia\u2019s botany lab. Bea moved into step behind him. He didn\u2019t seem to notice.<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cHow d\u2019ye do?\u201d said the man, extending a hand toward Hortensia who was, as usual, tapping notes into her laptop between careful inspections of her Koohoo plants. She looked up and blinked several times.<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cThe name\u2019s Charlie Friendly, and I represent Tropi-Pharm Botanical Products.\u201d<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cHello,\u201d said Hort. She looked vaguely relieved. Bea supposed that it was because the visitor wasn\u2019t that googly-eyed Miles Oakenshaw guy from the State Department of Biological Research again.<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cMiss Flannery,\u201d continued Charlie Friendly, \u201cThere\u2019s nothing Tropi-Pharm likes better than loyal customers…\u201d<\/p>\n \n\tHow does he know who she is?<\/em>..wondered Bea.<\/p>\n \n\t\u201c…and there\u2019s no better way to earn loyal customers than by letting them try our marvelous products!\u201d<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cOh,\u201d replied Hortensia, pushing her glasses to the top of her head so that she could look at the salesman directly. \u201cIs there something you want me to try?\u201d<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cIs there?\u201d asked Charlie Friendly. \u201cIs there ever!\u201d He set his black case on the counter with a wink, flicked the clasps open with a knowing nod, and then, with a dramatic flick of his wrist, displayed a large, bright green bottle with a happy goat featured prominently on the label.<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cAllow me to introduce Elixir of Capricorn!\u201d<\/em> said Charlie Friendly. He gave the bottle a twirl in his hand, then held it aloft with a rapturous gaze.<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cYour birds-of-paradise will practically take flight! Your philodendrons will grow as big as elephants\u2019 ears! Your Elephant Ears will grow as big as…dinosaur ears!\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n \n\t\u201cDinosaurs don\u2019t have ears,\u201d cut in Bea. \u201cAt least not ears you can see.\u201d<\/p>\n \n\tHortensia chuckled, but a scowl flitted across Charlie Friendly\u2019s face before being quickly replaced by his overly-grinny grin. He took a step to the side in order to get Bea within his field of view and, possibly, keep her under surveillance.<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cAllow me to demonstrate,\u201d said Charlie Friendly with a slight bow. He removed the bottle\u2019s lid with a quick twist, then tipped the bottle toward the row of Koohoo plants in front of Hortensia.<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cNo!\u201d cried Hortensia, wrapping her arms protectively around the five plants as she pulled them across the countertop, knocking over her tea in the process.<\/p>\n \n\tCharlie Friendly\u2019s face briefly flashed the scowl again, but he composed himself even faster this time and smiled.<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cLet me assure you Miss Flannery! Elixir of Capricorn is completely safe and has undergone years of research and testing!\u201d<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cOh, I\u2019m sure it has,\u201d replied Hortensia with a sheepish smile, \u201cbut I\u2019m doing very specific research with these plants and any additives to the soil could skew my findings.\u201d<\/p>\n \n\tIt was clear that she meant to soothe the salesman\u2019s feelings, but Hortensia still kept the Koohoo plants snugly in her protective embrace. \u201cPerhaps,\u201d she said, \u201cwe could try your elixir on the trumpet pitchers and the cobra plants?\u201d<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cYeah let\u2019s!\u201d agreed Bea. \u201cCarnivorous plants the size of elephant ears? Who wouldn\u2019t want that?\u201d<\/p>\n \n\tCharlie Friendly shot Bea a scathing glance, and completely dropped the cheerful fa\u00e7ade.<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cYou should consider, Miss Flannery,\u201d he said in a scolding tone, \u201cthat receptivity to new ideas is a key to research success.\u201d<\/p>\n \n\tDropping the green bottle into his case, he muttered \u201chummmph,\u201d and cast another long look at the koohoo plants. Hortensia pulled them a little closer. He then turned with another breathy huff and marched out of the room.<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cWell,\u201d said Hortensia. \u201cPerhaps we could use some larger pitcher plants. For when salespeople come calling.\u201d<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cOr government inspectors,\u201d added Bea. <\/p>\n \n\tHortensia smiled and nodded her agreement.<\/p>\n \n\tBea walked to the doorway and looked out. In the corridor Charlie Friendly was having a very heated discussion on his cell phone while gesturing accusingly toward the tropical lab where Bea was standing. The elevator opened and he stepped aboard.<\/p>\n \n\tWeird,<\/em> Bea thought. Salesmen should be able to deal with rejection better than that.<\/em> Besides, Hortensia didn\u2019t totally reject his sample, she just didn\u2019t want to use it on the Koohoo. Which is what he seemed to want. In fact, he seemed to want that very much. Charlie Friendly was not, she concluded, a normal salesman at all. Maybe he wasn\u2019t any kind of salesman at all. And, if not, who was he?<\/p>\n \n\tWhen Bea turned back toward the lab, the blue Jiffy-Ship envelope, which she\u2019d tucked between two pitcher plants caught her eye.<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cHort,\u201d she said. \u201cThis came for you.\u201d She handed the envelope to Hortensia, who ripped the zip-strip and pulled out a letter with such a bright green letterhead that Bea could tell, even from a distance, that it must be from Bean-tek Industries.<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cIt\u2019s from someone named Hiram Scalmo,\u201d said Hortensia, as she read. \u201cHe says he\u2019s the president of Bean-Tek Industries…and they\u2019re considering offering me grant money.\u201d She stopped reading and looked pensively at the ceiling. \u201cImagine what I could do with two financial grants,\u201d she said. \u201cHe wants me to come to his office at 2151 Glummer Place…tomorrow.\u201d<\/p>\n \n\tHortensia read the letter again, as if afraid she\u2019d missed something the first time. \u201cBea!\u201d she said. \u201cYou\u2019re coming with me!\u201d<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cOf course I am,\u201d said Bea.<\/p>\n \n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Bea propped both elbows on the turquoise countertop at Tylo\u2019s Corner Tea Shop. \u201cOne strawberry bubble tea, please,\u201d she said to Tylo, whose dreadlocks were caught up in a red hairnet that matched his cherry red shirt. \u201cSame thing for me,\u201d said Nola. \u201cBut peach.\u201d \u201cLadies…\u201d said Tyrone as he set his blenders to whirring, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[11],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.emilygillespieclement.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/335"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.emilygillespieclement.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.emilygillespieclement.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.emilygillespieclement.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.emilygillespieclement.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=335"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"http:\/\/www.emilygillespieclement.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/335\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":388,"href":"http:\/\/www.emilygillespieclement.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/335\/revisions\/388"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.emilygillespieclement.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=335"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.emilygillespieclement.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=335"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.emilygillespieclement.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=335"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}