Things were really messy at the Crunch & Barley Breakfast Factory. In Lyle LaFarge\u2019s flavor lab a scrawny man stirred the contents of a beaker with sloppy enthusiasm. <\/p>\n
\n\t\u201cUm…Mr. Twicky,\u201d said LaFarge wiping orange batter from his labcoat, \u201cthere\u2019ll be more for us to taste if you can keep it in the beaker.\u201d<\/p>\n
\n\t\u201cWon\u2019t taste right if it ain\u2019t mixed right,\u201d replied Twicky. He wiped a claw-like finger across a blob of batter on his name badge which said, \u201cMr. Twicky–Flavor Lab,\u201d<\/em> stuck it in his mouth, and licked his lips appreciatively. \u201cNever thought about that afore.\u201d<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cThought about what?\u201d asked LaFarge.<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cInjun squash in Pappy\u2019s hardtack,\u201d replied Twicky. \u201cWho thunk it up?\u201d<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cWe\u2019re not quite sure who put squash in the cereal dough,\u201d answered LaFarge.<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cGood thinkin\u2019,\u201d continued Twicky, \u201cbut lousy batter–cain\u2019t make decent hardtack outa\u2019 gruel. Lucky thing ya\u2019 shanghaied me.\u201d<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cLaFaaar-r-r-r-ge!\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n \n\tThat familiar voice from the hallway snapped LaFarge\u2019s attention away from Twicky and the batter-splattered lab. \n\tMr. Arg looked like he knew a secret. \u201cSo,\u201d he said with a nudge and a wink, \u201chow\u2019s me new Crunch & Barley spesh-ee-ality shaping up?\u201d<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cOh,\u201d replied LaFarge, \u201cSquashy-Tack. We think we\u2019ll have it ready for distribution in a week or two.\u201d<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cAnd will them fancy grown-ups like it?\u201d<\/p>\n \n\tLaFarge felt an unusual surge of confidence. \u201cSquashy-tack fuses old-fashioned sustenance with a modern flavor twist–I, for one, anticipate strong sales.\u201d<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cStrong sales,\u201d repeated Mr. Arg with a sly smile. \u201cOughta keep the Board of Dee-rectors outa my hair.\u201d<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cHave you met the new Board yet sir?\u201d asked LaFarge.<\/p>\n \n\tMr. Arg blew through his lips like a horse and shook his head. \u201cNo tellin\u2019 what kinda porridge-suckers and tea-sippers the stockholders will have picked out,\u201d he said. \u201cBut I got me ace in the hole. That rule what says I gets to pick one of \u2018em out meself. Someone who thinks a little like me, maybe.\u201d<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cThat\u2019s terrific sir,\u201d said LaFarge, wondering if it was, in fact, at all terrific. \u201cSo who did you pick?\u201d<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cThat\u2019s fer me ta\u2019 know LaFar-r-r-ge,\u201d replied his boss. \u201cCain\u2019t discuss it right now. Gots ta\u2019 git home and comb me whiskers…Going to a fancy-britches dinner at Chez Crispette.\u201d<\/p>\n \n\tTwicky stopped stirring and cackled. \u201cThe cap\u2019n\u2019s dallying with ladies, eh? Who\u2019s the muffet?\u201d<\/p>\n \n\tArg growled through a tightlipped smile. \u201cThat,\u201d he said, \u201cis fer me ta\u2019 know too.\u201d<\/p>\n \t\t\t\t*******************<\/p>\n \tAt breakfast the next morning, Skipper got the spyglass, and Lynette got the Flippin\u2019 Eights. Tilly got a glimpse of the hot United Delivery guy who brought an urgent letter to the kitchen door.<\/p>\n \n\tBut it was Fay LaFarge who got the urgent letter. An opportunity. An invitation. A position as the \u201ckid consultant\u201d on the Crunch & Barley Breakfast Factory Board of Directors. Fay shoveled a large spoonful of Cinnamon Rogers into her mouth, and considered. Maybe it was time to stop looking out only for herself. She\u2019d just saved her family from being shish-kebabed after all. Maybe now she could look out for everyone who ever ate Jolly Rogers cereal.<\/p>\n \n\t\u201cYep,\u201d she said. \u201cI\u2019ll take it.\u201d<\/p>\n \nTHE END<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Things were really messy at the Crunch & Barley Breakfast Factory. In Lyle LaFarge\u2019s flavor lab a scrawny man stirred the contents of a beaker with sloppy enthusiasm. \u201cUm…Mr. Twicky,\u201d said LaFarge wiping orange batter from his labcoat, \u201cthere\u2019ll be more for us to taste if you can keep it in the beaker.\u201d \u201cWon\u2019t taste […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[10],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.emilygillespieclement.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/202"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.emilygillespieclement.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.emilygillespieclement.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.emilygillespieclement.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.emilygillespieclement.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=202"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"http:\/\/www.emilygillespieclement.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/202\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":204,"href":"http:\/\/www.emilygillespieclement.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/202\/revisions\/204"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.emilygillespieclement.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=202"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.emilygillespieclement.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=202"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.emilygillespieclement.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=202"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\n\t\u201cMr. Arg,\u201d said LaFarge, nodding to his boss.<\/p>\n